Grab a pencil and paper – it’s time to find out how well you and your partner’s relationship is doing. Will it last – or are you headed for trouble? Well, Dr. Dean Edell says a simple “love test” may be the way to find out.
DEAN EDELL, M.D.
“Some people think of it as taking the plunge – others believe it’s more like a leap of faith into matrimony. Every year millions of people decide to tie the knot, and even though many weddings have a storybook quality, the reality is that more of half of these marriages will end.
“If you think about it, for just about anything else in life you have to prepare. Want to drive a car? You have to learn how to behave on the road, then pass a test. But if you want to get married, all you do is plunk down a few bucks and say ‘I do.’ But since this can impact your life like nothing else, researchers say, maybe there ought to be more to it.
“Everyone knows how exciting the start of a relationship can be when a couple can’t seem to get enough of each other. But eventually the glow of romance fades a bit in the harsh light of everyday reality, and many couples are not prepared to handle the difference.
“One way to predict the likelihood of that – a test called “Prepare,” in which both members of the couple answer questions about what they expect in a relationship. For instance, what would you answer to the statement: ‘I am very satisfied with the amount of affection I receive.’ Or this: ‘I sometimes feel pressured to participate in activities my partner enjoys.’
“Such questions can be revealing, because reading the answers can help couples learn more about each other’s fears and expectations – ahead of time.”
“The thought of being married makes you uneasy.”
“I think it’s a natural feeling.”
“We’ve been engaged for 11 months, are you still uneasy?”
DEAN EDELL, M.D.
“The originators of the ‘Prepare’ test say it can determine with 80 to 85% accuracy who in three years will be happily married and who’s likely to be divorced. Of course nothing’s perfect – but wouldn’t it be nice to have a head start on beating those poor marriage odds?”
The real “Prepare” test involves 200 questions given by a counselor – but they have prepared a mini-version that you can take online. All you answer is 10 simple questions that could give you a hint whether your relationship needs some work or you need the full 200 question test.